Do you have such a thing as a Cat Dancer out there?

Oh yes. We are most familiar with the cat dancer. My friend Em calls them the "best cat toy since people". While I think that particular honor goes to the laser pointer, I don't think she's far wrong. We don't have any onhand right now though -- all the toys currently in the house are Nadia hand-me-downs, and she bored of it quickly. I do plan to try them on it, though, the next time I get to the pet store.

I must assume they have taught you and T to obey and to fetch

Naturally. We know our place. ;)